Easter

I drove to within two stoplights of the VA yesterday and wanted to go visit dad. I didn’t. It is Easter this week and I would like to take him with to Dinner. I probably won’t. Think what you like. I don’t want to be responsible for peoples memory of “that Easter”….And I don’t believe we would be able to get him in the car to go back. I can’t read the future, so I could be wrong. I doubt I would be wrong. I took him with last Easter and it was him, in and out of the church bathroom, in and out of the church to smoke, and he ate so much food before the service was over that there wasn’t enough left for our small congregation to all have food. It was not enjoyable at all, no fond memories made. I will go buy him something and drop it off for him. Maybe a new movie. He has no idea what Easter means, he is scared to death of anything to do with God or Jesus. 

When I was very little, my parents gave me an Easter basket and a bunny, I put the bunny in the basket and swung it around until it fell out and then as I was walking (waddling), I accidentally kicked the poor bunny and it ran away. I only know this because it is a part of some home movies that dad took on his 8mm camera, it isn’t like I have memory of it. There is footage of dad holding me, and he looks at me like he is so in love. That is not a memory either. It’s just what I can see on a movie reel, that he loved me once.